EMMA PHILBROOK: STUDENT LIFE

I n honor of the upcoming holiday, I present a list of the twenty spookiest things about senior year. 20: Class papers, which used to be cute little five-paragraph essays, have morphed into six-page behemoths that would just love to messily devour your free time. (Eeeek!) 19: Just when you thought the SAT was out of your life for good, there's suddenly an "SAT Practice" problem at the end of every lesson in your math book. (Aiiiiiiiiiiiiiie!) 18: Student loans are lurking just over the horizon. (Oh no! We're DOOMED!)

17: Normally fun things - like Homecoming, annual school band concerts, and league rivalry games - suddenly bear the ominous tag "my last". (Dun Dun DUNNNhellip;) 16: Eight words: "Aren't you a little too old for that?" (NOOOOOOOOO!) 15. As you watch your parents stress over bills, compile grocery lists, play phone tag while trying to schedule appointments, and fret about broken appliances, it hits you hellip; in less than a year, this will be you. (No. No! HEEEEELP!) 14: There's a lot of paperwork to fill out, and it comes in addition to your regular coursework. (Ummmhellip;I'm starting to run out of scary interjections.) 13: Senior portraits are $300, graduation stuff is at least $50, college application fees can run all the way up to $75, it's $12 to send an SAT score report to a college and $15 to send an AP, and after writing their ten-gazillionth check, your parents start to think that you should help out with the costs of your senior year. (Say it ain't so, Mom!) 12: The colleges just don't give up. Your mailbox is choked with mailers, your inbox gets at least 50 messages from colleges per day. Even after their deadlines pass, they say that "there's still time to apply!" (Get away from me. GET AWAY!!!) 11: A senior-level math problem: Late nights + early mornings = a Current World Problems class full of zombies. And also an Advanced Math class. And English IV. 10: The shattering realization that you are never, ever, ever going to be Homecoming queen. This usually takes place about thirty minutes after someone else's coronation. 9: Philbrook's Law of Homework in the Twelfth Grade: "It never rains, but it pours". Either your whole afternoon is mind-numbingly free or you're up until midnight. 8: The uncertainty. Which colleges will accept you? Which scholarships will you be awarded? Will that cool aunt you've only met twice come to your graduation party? 7: You know at least ten people who get to go on awesome senior trips. As your senior year is now your financial responsibility ("Young lady, I'm not paying for $300 worth of senior portraits and a cruise to Bora Bora!"), your "awesome senior trip" is to Arby's. (Sob.) 6: If you're dating, the realization that your relationship is gonna get complicated. 5: If you're not, the realization that you never will while in high school. 4: Coulda, woulda, shoulda. 'Nuff said. 3: Too young to be an adult, too old to avoid the "adult" price at movie theaters. 2: "Undead-lines". You knew it was due December 1, and suddenly you get an email saying "November 1". (It MOVED! It's ALIIIIIIVE!) 1: Parents start getting sappy about your leaving. As do you.